Monday, November 19, 2007

an old friend

"you don't stand in front of a mirror before a run wondering what the road will think of your outfit. you don't have to listen to its jokes and pretend they're funny in order to run on it. it would not be easier to run if you dressed sexier. the road doesn't notice if you're not wearing lipstick. does not care how old you are. you do not feel uncomfortable because you make more money than the road. and you can call on the road whenever you feel like it. whether it's been a day...or even a couple of hours since your last date. the only thing that the road cares about, is that you pay it a visit once in a while" -nike ad in What Women Want.

i went running on lamar today for the first time in a month. after the race, i joined the gym at work so i had just been running there. but i had today off and with nothing to do at 8 o'clock this morning decided to put on my shoes and head out. i had forgotten how much i love running up and down lamar. how well i knew it, and how well it knew me. hitting 4:30 at 71st street, during the rock out section of Heaven Hear Us. 8:30ish at 75th street. not quite realizing that my pace was that fast. my legs just went into muscle memory. knowing exactly where the hills were, and how hard they'd have to push in order to stay on pace. if i could just make it to the bear house (a house wtih a bear figurine in the front yard made out of a tree trunk, sits at the top of a hill before 69th) then i know it'd be flat until home. i turned on 68th and didn't even realize that i was on my street until i ran past my neighbors house.

i got home and felt like i could have run for miles. people often have different experiences when they run. for some it's a form of meditation almost. i had never experienced that, always being super aware of my surroundings and what was going on, that i was never "tuned out". until today. it was perfect.

for probably the first time ever i stopped "thinking". my mind went somewhere else and i let it go. and i was richly rewarded. i didn't have to fake my excitement in running through ankle deep leaves. i didn't have to rationalize why i needed to breathe and walk until the 3rd tree after 71st. thr road just knew. like an old friend would know. and it smiled and drew me deeper into it's comfort.

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

light

So the last 20 minutes of work today was amazing. mainly because i didn't really have much to do (some would argue that i never have anything to do) and just stared out the window at the sunset. it was definitely one of those Lisa Frank sunsets where the sky is 15 different colors and looks like a nebula. i would glance away for a second and the sky would change like a kaleidoscope. Nothing like having a west facing window 5 stories up in downtown kc. so beautiful.

by the time i had left work, the sun had fully set. so i drove home in the dark. i LOVE when it starts to get dark at 5:30. there is just something so serene about driving home in the early evening and being able to see the stars. or lights. Everything seems simpler, more clear in the darkness. you can actually see the light.

I drove down the highway, the kc skyline on my left, the buildings freckled with office lights still on. ruby and diamond strings of head and tail lights stretched out in front of me while Amos Lee's soulful voice carried my cares away. it was one of those moments where the world just is. life might be heavy or light, confusing or understood, chaotic or peaceful, but in that moment, life just IS.

And you can sit at work irritated that its 5:30 and you're still there, or you can look out the window and wonder in awe at how creative and beautiful our God is. You can sit in traffic and be bitter, or you can see jewels sprinkled everywhere you look, and a hear a soundtrack that couldn't be more perfect if someone had spent years planning it. And though the darkness has it's arms around you, you can't stop staring at the light. funny how that happens...