Wednesday, November 26, 2008


You know when you hear something and it just strikes you and that's all you can think about. Or when you see something and that image is BURNED in your mind and although you don't think about it all the time, occasionally it comes back up and it's all you can see.

my mind is consumed. my heart is burning. its the same story that's been in the back of my mind since that one night at starbucks in thailand-almost 4 years ago. and i have little more vision now than i did then. all i know is that i was enjoying my frappuccino on the 3rd story patio balcony of the starbucks on the beach-she was standing on the street below-turning tricks. never mind the "couple" at the table to our left. he was late 40s early 50s, she was maybe 17.

i wonder what their names are? are they still working? are they still alive? how old were they then? 14? 17? which is actually relatively old considering...

needless to say, i'm having a hard time focusing on work today-and i really want to see this movie!

Monday, November 24, 2008

is this really my life?!?

so maybe waiting isn't so bad. you know? I'm starting to miss it actually. ha ha. i found out last week that i got a new position at my company that I've wanted (and prayed for, and had friends pray for) for over a year! it was such an awesome feeling knowing all the refining that had taken (and continues to take place) over that time.

I'm generally not the most patient person. if something doesn't happen within about 2 weeks i generally give up and move on. not with this. i really felt that God was moving with my job stuff, but i just didn't know when or how that would work out. there were many times when i wanted to give up and quit and work at starbucks but i just knew that He had something more for me. so i pressed on.

when i found out last week, i was SO proud of myself for being faithful, and not giving up. I'm not sure if God says "i told you so" often but i could feel him saying that over me with a smile.

then i thought of this verse...mal 3:10. it has been INCREDIBLE to really not be able to contain the blessings. i don't even know what to do with myself half the time. i go around wondering if this is my life or if it's a movie. it just seems that over the last week it was the best case scenario every single time. or I'd think of how cool it would be if this happened or that happened and then the most wild possibility would end up happening. my little plans were GREATLY overshadowed by what He's longing to pour out over me.

so after a week of that, I've resigned (ha ha) to the fact that He's just going to blow me away. and I'm PUMPED!! bring it! ;)

"Test me in this," says the LORD Almighty, "and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that you will not have room enough for it." -malachi 3:10b